Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /home/content/68/5116668/html/wp-content/themes/lifestyle_40/functions.php:14) in /home/content/68/5116668/html/wp-content/plugins/wp-greet-box/includes/wp-greet-box.class.php on line 496
Today's Cliche: "It's Bittersweet"; Pyrex Culinary Contest | Today's Cliche - Marriage, Family, & Working Mommy... from BOTH Women's and Men's Perspectives

Friday, June 23, 2017

She Said: “It’s Bittersweet”

September 15, 2010 by Kat  

I’m bitter.

And I’ve been having major bittersweet issues.

I’m bitter b/c my husband is “working” (clearing throat) in Ft. Lauderdale while seeing, and staying with, my Dad. You know, the Dad who is my only living parent. Yeah, that one. And, I’m jealous. I haven’t been to my parent’s place since my Mom died. I want to be there. Having an Appletini with my Dad. But, the breadwinner’s career comes first, I guess. Whatev.  I am still bitter, though. Aren’t I allowed?  And, he leaves me here with 4 kids for 3 days, 2 boot.

Instead of bouncing off the walls at the fact that one of the most exciting experiences that I’ve worked towards is actually coming to fruition, I’m feeling bittersweet.

My mom didn’t raise her 6 children in an era when girlfriends actually got together for cocktails and conversation after school or work (speaking of which, I’d better get my a$s in gear, as the kids are getting off the bus and I’m heading to a friend’s for the aforementioned cocktails as soon as I press “publish”).

Women, “back then” didn’t really even pick up the phone to share recipes. Every recipe needed to be hand written out, with no such thing as emailing each other recipes, or have an UNLIMITED database of options as to how to make Corned Beef, or Welsh Rarebit, or succulent Pot Roast.  The only cooking show was Julia Child’s, which I recall was on just preceding or immediately following good ‘ole Phil Donahue.

My parents had their 1st child in Germany — I can only imagine how isolated she felt. Not knowing anyone and being away from her entire family for the first time, and taming the unchartered waters of being a newlywed, my mom POURED her heart and soul into learning how to cook the good ‘ole old fashioned way.  I know for a fact she didn’t know WHERE to start in the kitchen… but knowing she wanted to impress, and take care of, her new groom’s appetite… she dove in head first.

I could go on and on and ON and ON about my mom’s passion for cooking. If anyone ever stated the word “Patricia” or “Patricia Schneider”, what IMMEDIATELY surfaced from their mouths was: “OH. MY. GOSH. She is the most amazing cook I’ve ever met.”  My friends envied the breakfasts we’d run onto the buses with in the mornings, with it oozing out of the tin foil; the lunches she prepared for our lunchboxes; and our weekday dinners (that their parents would ONLY even consider making for a Major holiday extravaganza).  Everyone was in AWE and could not wrap their head around the amount of time she spent pouring her heart out in the kitchen.

So, WHY do I have bittersweet thoughts as I prepare for next week’s Live, “Culinary Challenge”? Admittedly, I AM SOOOOO honored, delighted, and a smidge nervous about next Friday — when Dave and I compete against just one other couple as “America’s Hottest Culinary Couple”, in New York City on Friday, Sept. 24th.

HOWEVER, I want my Mommy there. I want my Mommy back. I wanted more than anything to CALL her and tell her MOMMY — WE MADE IT TO THE FINAL TWO!?!?!? CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!! NBC INTERVIEWED US! THEY’RE FLYING US UP AND PUTTING US UP IN A HOTEL!!” She’d be so proud that she effectively passed down her love for preparing food for those she loves. Without. Even. Realizing. It.

Primarily, I’m feeling bittersweet because I won’t EVER have the chance to tell her in person that ALL of this is dedicated to her. Specifically, I am dedicating this experience to her passion for how she expressed her love through food.
Most of all, I want her back. This is a
bittersweet experience for me.

Related Posts with Thumbnails

Comments

14 Responses to “She Said: “It’s Bittersweet””
  1. Tara says:

    thanks for the tears… another great post.. although bittersweet for me as well, as I watch you, my cousin and best friend, go through this very exciting experience without being able to pick up the phone to call “the Nan”. It makes me so sad.. BUT, we both know that.. like Cec said the other day in the car when you almost drove off the road after finding out the great news… “Nana already knows, SHE KNEW FIRST!” Out of the mouths of babes…. i couldn’t have said it better Cec… it’s so true. As long as we.. especially you.. BELIEVE that, than this experience will be just a little less bittersweet:) Congrats and I love you and know the nan is so very proud of you. I know she was voting from heaven:) xoxo

    [Reply]

    Kat Reply:

    THANK YOU. That meant soo much!

    [Reply]

  2. Karen Aviolla-Stone says:

    Kathy
    Congrats on this amazing time in your life. I love your post and I am sure your mom is watching over you and the amazing life you have built for yourself because of the great foundation your parents laid for you. Good luck and best wishes to you and your hubby from an old school friend.

    Karen

    [Reply]

    Kat Reply:

    Karen – oh my gosh… I loved your second sentence… yes, my parents did lay an amazing foundation… and I remember SO much of our childhood and playdates together… it’s not even funny!

    Primarily, walking to that strip mall by your house in Commack… that Italian rest. had the best garlic knots!! Oh, and your living room wall FULL FULL FULL of VHS videos. So crazy to think how OUTDATED and “1980s” they are now!

    [Reply]

  3. Crap. I have mascara rolling down my cheeks. Your post made me cry. I am overwhelmingly beyond excited for you! I am crossing everything that you guys win this!

    I’m so sorry that you don’t have your mom to share this with. But I know with everything inside of me down to the aching, very core of my soul that she knows…. and she’s smiling down from heaven and more than proud of what you accomplished.

    I know that if you talk I’m sure she can hear you. {HUGS} I’m rooting for you all the way from Oregon!!!!

    [Reply]

    Kat Reply:

    You really, REALLY, REALLY think she “knows”?? I pray to GOD she is smiling down from heaven and proud. We have to believe, and have hope, that all of this is true. I am ridiculously strong in my faith, and am a Christ Follower to my Core… however, even the strongest of convictions can still have you scratching your head. YOU WANT to believe it soo badly… but sometimes logic has you second guessing yourself.

    Anywho, my Oregon friend (I’d LOVE to see that state… can only imagine how gorgeous!), thank you!

    Oh, and I do talk to her. Like. Every 20 seconds.

    [Reply]

  4. CONGRATS!!!

    You totally, totally deserve it.

    Also?

    You’re so freaking adorable, now every time I read your writing I picture you and it just makes me go all *squee she is so adorable!* in my head.

    And I bet your mom would be SO proud of you and all your accomplishments.

    Which are ginormous.

    [Reply]

    Kat Reply:

    Ginormous?!?! Is that even a word? It has a red squiggly beneath it to the left, as I type, so I’m assuming it’s not. LAUGHING that you think I’m “cute”. Hardly. Loud. Yes. Obnoxious. Yes. But cute? Hmmm….

    PS – For anyone reading, Megan is friggin’ awesome.

    [Reply]

  5. Rebekah C says:

    This was beautiful and touching and heartfelt and bittersweet. I like to believe those who have passed on are aware of how we feel but I don’t think that takes the sting of their loss away in the slightest. *hugs*

    [Reply]

    Kat Reply:

    I hope, and pray, for the same thing — I, however, hope they only see the GOOD thoughts we have.. and not all of the heartache their loss has effected their lives. That would be catastrophic to her (to see our pain and suffering), considering she was THE ONE who ALWAYS worried others (but never WANTED others to think twice about her).

    [Reply]

  6. I’m choked up reading this post. congrats on making it as a finalist! now go bring home the win for your mom.

    [Reply]

    Kat Reply:

    Teresha – Oh my gosh. Your last sentence… “Now go bring home the win for your mom” struck such a chord in me! It’ll TOTALLY, COMPLETELY, be ringing in my ears if I ever doubt myself next Friday. Thank you for that!

    [Reply]

  7. Tracie says:

    I’m so very proud of you! They had better pick y’all or blog-land will come after them!

    Your mom knows what you are doing. She knows and she is proud of you and she will be cheering the loudest when you win.

    [Reply]

  8. I am in tears. That was so sweet, yet so sad. Good luck! Make your mama proud! I’ll be rooting for you. :)

    [Reply]

Speak Your Mind

Tell us what you're thinking...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!

CommentLuv Enabled

Protected by Copyscape DMCA Takedown Notice Search Tool MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected