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He Said: “Shame on Me!” | Today's Cliche - Marriage, Family, & Working Mommy... from BOTH Women's and Men's Perspectives

Wednesday, November 21, 2018

He Said: “Shame on Me!”

October 7, 2010 by  

For the second time in this site’s history, I’ve been called out as a boob.  The first time was by my wife (read here) and was 100% justified.  This time, however, I’m calling myself out, and again, it’s 100% justified.

I was a bonehead yesterday.  Not necessarily because of what I did, but mostly because of my “worst-case-scenario” thinking.

If I had to guess, I’d estimate that 83% of us (or more!) were talking on the phone for at least a minute or two on the drive home yesterday.  Of those driving and talking, how many got into a fender-bender?  I can safely say at least one.

Why am I a bonehead/boob?  Because the first thing I thought when I rear-ended the car in front of me was “Why in the WORLD didn’t he go??!  There was a ton of room between cars!”  Stupid…and stupid.  Shame on me for putting myself first, when I was at fault.

A young kid gets out of the car in front of me, and his first concern was the car.  It was obviously his dad’s Mercedes, and by his body language, my next thought is “great, super – this guy’s father is going to have a field day with me.”  Shame on me, again, for putting me first, when this kid was probably shaking in his shoes.  He just got into an accident with his dad’s car!

We exchange information, I ask him (repeatedly) if he’s ok – which he is – and we both agreed that there was only a scratch on the bumper.  I have to give the kid credit – I’m not sure I would have been as cool & collected when I was his age.

So later in the evening I’m at the store and I receive a call from an unknown local number.  Double shame on me  – first for not answering it right away and second for assuming the worst.  I KNOW it’s his dad, either claiming injury to his son, or extensive damage to his (not-so) new Mercedes.

I walked outside and called him back, expecting the worst.  What I found on the other end of the line was a father just covering his bases, letting me know that his son is fine, the car is ok – only a minor scratch that he’ll buff out – and that I have nothing to worry about.  I sheepishly thanked him for his call, glad to know that he couldn’t see in MY face how disappointed I was in myself.

I’m sure many of you have stories that go “the other way” – where you thought everything was fine but it turned out to be a nightmare.  This was one instance where I messed up (in more ways than one) but the people who could influence the situation the most turned out to be role models for all of us to follow.

All this being said, he DID have enough room to go!

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6 Responses to “He Said: “Shame on Me!””
  1. Erin says:

    Dave, I hit a coworker’s car in the parking lot a few weeks ago. Wasn’t even on the phone when her empty, parked car jumped out in front of me while I was pulling into my spot. I blamed the poorly designed parking lot! Really, you have to enter and then park at an angle facing the opposite direction and it takes about a 17 point turn to do it. Anyway, i feel your pain, as does my wallet after the $500 deductible. The coworker was as amicable about the whole thing as the kid and his dad.


    Dave Reply:

    I still don’t have the courage to blog about the accident a few years ago – which was MY fault – caused by a grasshopper! I’d like to claim it had fangs and red eyes, but…


  2. CK says:

    We were in Michigan a few years back–borrowing my husband’s brother’s car. We were following that brother and his family (they were driving his wife’s car) on our way to a birthday party. Yep, you guessed it. My husband totally rear-ended his own brother… and took out both their family’s cars in the process! That was fun. Needless to say, I did the driving the rest of that trip! And his brother has never let him live it down!!


    Dave Reply:

    Talk about a double whammy! His brother is doing the right thing – he HAS to keep on him, as any brother/friend would do…

    Thanks for sharing!


  3. Ally says:

    Wow – major kudos to the kid and his dad for being so cool! And I have to admit, I would have expected the worst, too.


    Dave Reply:

    Definite kudos. You watch – next time I’ll assume the best and end up rear-end a jerk. That’s how it works, right?


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