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She Said: “Shame on Me!” | Today's Cliche - Marriage, Family, & Working Mommy... from BOTH Women's and Men's Perspectives

Wednesday, November 21, 2018

She Said: “Shame on Me!”

October 7, 2010 by  

Tell us the truth… were you REALLY on the phone w/a client (yeah right), or were you looking up ESPN scores on your Storm / iStorm / xStorm / xBox… whatever the hell that phone that totally SUCKS to type on is? Or, texting? I highly doubt that simply by talking on the phone you bump someone in front of you. I mean, can’t you freakin multi task like us mommas do? I’ve seen you do it… you know, about once or twice, when you had to strategically grab some wipes as diarrhea from the baby’s diaper was oozing out onto your forearm.

I’m just giving you sh!t because this easily could have been me. What a little boy scout for actually acknowledging you were wrong. It’s actually pretty attractive. Adorable. Nauseating. Why don’t you admit you’re wrong when it involved MOI?

When I think of my “Shame on Me!” moments this week, I realize I couldn’t possibly share with you the most intimate, dark, utterly prejudice ones here on this blog.

You want me to spill, right? If you think it’s so darn easy… why don’t YOU comment with one of your most humiliating “Shame on Me’s”? I double dog dare yah.

  • Shame on me for spending an entire month’s mortgage on Fall clothes & diapers for the kids, in a 2-day period. I. really. did. big. gulp.





… Gymboree was having a 20% off sale… and Gap/Old Navy a 30% off sale. Did you forget we have 3 boys? These clothes need to sift through 3 crusty kids. And we have one girl whose social status in 2nd grade is dependant upon what she wears, yah know. You’re gagging, I know, me too. I’m just jagging, just got her the staples. Swear.

  • Shame on me for the vicious thought I had at the Grocery Store this morning.

ADMIT you have ALL thought about it, at least once, even in your adult life: “What if” the check out clerk JUST HAPPENS not to see the $17.99 itsy bitsy tube of hair defrizzing gel [or insert overpriced, fairly small item you reeeallllllllly want need] in the cart?

There He was. That damn devil. Sitting on my shoulder as if his sh!t didn’t stink. I quickly slapped the snot out of him brushed him off, and was off on my merry way down the aisles of countless beauty products SCREAMING MY NAME “Kat… PICK ME, PICK ME! I promise I’ll dry up all your nodular zits on your jawbone… and OH, I’ll make sure your hair never grows on your upper lip again!! Pick me!!”

Who really even lets the THOUGHT of shoplifting enter their minds (except for the wife of an overly anal husband who FREAKS OUT OVER every little receipt these days)?? I was disgusted. It was a .00000000000000000000008 second fleeting thought, but it surfaced. Just a reminder that Satan is constantly looking for us to trip up and give him an opportunity to take over.

Well… if the freakin’ hairdresser didn’t RAZOR the ends of my (sorely missed…) blunt cut, NONE of these crazy thoughts would have entered my head. I went from thick, all-one-length locks to RAZORED, layered edges. It’s like a mass suicide of the hair follicle ends.

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One Response to “She Said: “Shame on Me!””
  1. Tracie says:

    Now you know that I am going to spend the rest of the night wondering what that third thing is, don’t you? Because I will.

    Kid’s clothes are insane. Sometimes I wonder why I never went into the kid’s clothing business….then I could actually afford to buy them!


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